2011 Brownlow Average Dressed

Ahh. The time has come again, to rip through each of these poor unsuspecting ladies.

I decided to title the list ‘average dressed’ this year. I’d hate to be put on a worst dressed list, but could handle average. Imagine if I went to the brownlow, I would probably be dressed by Big W.
This is just a bit of fun, we all know that some of these ladies only get told they are invited 2 weeks before hand.
I don’t know many names of the girls this year, sorry. Probably a good thing so that when they google their names today they don't see this....
 What is going on here. The lace looks like it was sewn on in the Camry on the way there. Not flattering at all. Not sure about the cuff either. Less is more. Also, is there such a thing as black being too black??
 I wish there were more photos of this lass. The back of this dress looks quite interesting. It's like a snake got dipped in OPI Shatter, and then started to shed it's scales.
Also, her hair would have looked better up, in a nice bun.
Rebecca Twigley rang from 2004, she wants her dress back.
If something has already been done and done well, leave it alone sister.

I want to know who designed this frock. Then I want to make sure I never enter that shop incase I get brainwashed and leave the house looking like this.

I just don’t get it.

It looks like a formal dress circa 1992, crossed with a mermaid who is tangled in seaweed.

The one sleeve thing is creeping me out too. There is way too much going on with this.
When I first saw Lauren Phillips, I thought she had on a jump suit. I still don’t know if it was a dress or not.

I actually like the top part but the bottom part is not doing it for me. Her hair is looking shocking also.

Come on Loz, you can do better. We know that you are a big wig on the blue carpet and have designers throwing couture gowns at you, and Nicola Finetti let us down.

I liked her clutch though.

Anyone think Laurens face looked a bit ‘off’ this year? She is normally so pretty. Her arm looks nice and lean.


Who is this and what is going on here? I had a chuckle watching her on the massive Lazy Susan circa 1995 at Ling Wah Chinese Restaurant on Nepean Highway in Frankston. She tried so hard to have her ‘come hither’ face on, and then she nearly stacked it.

I heard her say that if the dress was good enough for Fashion Week in New York, it was good enough for her.

Sorry – it wasn’t good enough for Fashion Week in the first place.

It looks like it has those plastic rings that get stuck on seals from beer cans stuck to the bottom. She didn’t smile once either. A smile can make an outfit 10x better.

Her hairdresser obviously hates her.
A surprise entrant here.

I like Rebecca Judd, I think she is gorgeous.

I just feel like we have seen this before. Can’t Aurelio Costarella surprise us for once? When Rebecca said that it wasn’t mustard, it’s corn I just thought to my self ‘No, it’s dehydrated urine’. I’ve read around the traps today that people think she has had some work done to her face. Thoughts?

How does she look like that a few months after giving birth to Oscar. How, HOW I ASK YOU??!?!

I actually love the cap sleeves though. They are #winning. The shoes however, are #losing. They don’t go with the dress at all, there is already too much going on. Some nude open toe CL’s would have done the trick.

I think her hair looks stunning though. Me likey.
The mullet dress.

Party in the front, business in the back.

Don’t do this to me, I can’t handle it.

Nice shoes dude.
This could have been quite nice, if it was not so ill fitting on the bust. What is going on here?? I wore a sequin covered dress to my sisters wedding and had cut shoulders from it, imagine how heavy this bad boy must have been.

I think this could have worked, but it didn’t.

I like the colour though. Hair tied back in a sharp bun would have worked also.
Lauren Tscharky.
Is it just me or is this dress 2 different colours? A pearl bodice and a dusty pink skirt? It’s like they added the embellishment to try and disguise that, didn’t work though.

I never understand front slits. Sure, if I had her legs I would probably rock a front slit all day long, but I don’t – therefore I don’t understand them. Very bridal.
There is nothing wrong with this, it just does nothing for her.  
Alright. I am confused, once again. I feel like she belongs in a really sad and gloomy opera. Are they dirty white rosettes on the hips? Not feeling it.
A bodice like this deserves a figure hugging skirt also. She has a nice figure, so should have gone for it. I like her smile though.
Ahh Brynne. You never disappoint me, NEVER!!!

I love how many times she announced that she loved the designer so much that they just bought 50% of the company.

Clearly the designer does not love her, or she would make the bodice fit her breasts properly. How hard is it?!?!

Brynne has killer legs. She is/was a personal trainer isn’t she? She can come and train me and turn my pork chops into drumsticks. I like her, she cracks me up. I love her self confidence also.
I want to see close ups of the shoes, any brand suggestions?
This is better than what she wore the last 2 years, that is fo shizzle.
Tania Hird. I have nothing much to say, other than I don’t like this on her.

I have never watched The Amazing Race but they tell me Renae Wauhop was on it. I’ll tell you what’s amazing – how that dress did not pop open and reveal her lady lumps, that’s what!!
This was obviously a very “I’ve been on a reality TV show so there will 100% be photos of me and I am going to make sure that they don’t over look me” moment. She has a killer bod though. Cannot say that I blame her for wearing it.

I just don’t like gold lame lightening bolt dresses.


I’m sad that there were not too many shockers.

Also, what was the deal with them having to start in the drive way at Crown? Don’t people know how dirty the floor is??? Not very glamorous.

My major damage was done to my wedding dress when walking from reception at Crown Metropol to the limo, 1 meter away.

Thoughts? Are any of my “Average Dressed” on your “Best Dressed”?

I remember Geefa used to go to the Brownlow, thanks for the invite Geef.

How boring is the count.

Best Dressed still to come. 

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